I’m a bit tipsy (at best) and working on a piece about “personal branding” for some of my students.
“Interesting,” you say. Think that’s interesting? OK, well you’re a twat. Or a cunt. What’s the fashionable term these days? Anyway, you don’t need to say that’s it’s interesting, or give me any positive affirmation, because it really isn’t interesting. You and I both know it’s just a job. Don’t get me wrong, I like you regardless! But this shit that I do is a job, a thing I do that brings in money, and that’s it. This is the weird lovely world we live in.
All the stuff we get to do for free is brilliant. You know, going to the park, seeing friends, having them over to your/my place (mine has hookah and a bunch of weird plants on the porch, but you have some cachaça and a real-life karaoke machine!) talking, fucking, checking our phones intermittently for a respite, listening to album streams – album streams, for Christ’s sake. Think about it, think about how beautifully, brilliantly fucked up it is that a pretty famous musician will let you listen to their whole album for free, because they’re not making enough money from the music business in this bog-foresaken capitalist age. So, let’s not say that we have it too hard. We’re pretty well off, by any standard, even if it doesn’t feel that way.
But anyway, yeah, my dog bit a frog. He was pretty much keeled over, trying to puke and failing miserably (like, puking-upwards-style failing). Seriously, he is the John Bonham of tiny dogs. Luckily we had some milk and water and salt available, which is apparently all you need to help a dog when it gets poisoned – either that, or Pedro really wanted to avoid taking him to the vet (Pedro has done this ten times). He’s OK now, staggering around a bit, looking a little lost, kind of like the way I do when I wake up in an unfamiliar bed, I guess. He’ll be fine in the morning.
When you have a job, it brings money in. When you come home from your job, the frog-biter doesn’t really care whether you just hedged Shapeways against Facebook or if you cleaned a bit of scum off Mr. Shepherd’s toilet. You have a body? You have a face? It will be licked. Capitalism is weird like that.
Why are you personally branding your students? I feel like that would be illegal in most circumstances. Illegal, but not interesting.
Still a twat, J.